It's five in the morning and I'm still not asleep. I have spent hours and hours scouring through university exchange options, and have become quite attached to the idea of applying to the University of California; possibly at the Berkeley, Los Angeles, or Santa Barbara campuses. For so long I have dreamed and obsessed about going to Europe and of living there; but at this moment everything seems to be stopping me from exchanging there. I have never been attracted to America, probably because I'm terrified of how massive all their universities seem to be. But the courses on offer at the UC campuses are extensive and more applicable to my degree than the ones at Sciences Po. in Paris, which is where I would otherwise apply. I feel so incredibly torn between choosing Europe for its culture and to immerse myself in a foreign language, or to take this opportunity to study at one of the best universities in the entire world. And the exchange program between UoA and UC is only available to undergrads. Maybe I need to step back and get some perspective instead of jumping too fast. After all, the priority is ultimately the education; UC will teach me so much about the fields I am interested in, and then I can use that knowledge to venture to Europe later, either to do post grad or to live. Everything is crowding around me at the moment and it's overwhelming, I feel like I have ridiculous amounts to get done, but procrastinating too much. Life is exciting but so stressful.
